Found an old diary extract...thought i would put it up. Is no nice remembering happy times even ones filled with terror of the wrath of Mistress. Of course i am such a lucky gurl that my fab life serving the amazing Mistress Scarlett Thorne continues. So i shall be posting more up to date diaries again soon.
Wednesday 28 August 2013
It is hard to describe the feeling of overwhelming joy and relief simultaneously mixing with utter fear and panic. That was the feeling when i got a text message from Mistress Scarlett Thorne at 7pm announcing Her imminent return to the Tranny Flat and demanding that it was ready for seven sessions the next day.
The joy and relief came from the fact that the text meant Mistress still wanted me to serve Her. i take the part of my mantra that service is "
a privilege not a right" very seriously and have had plenty of experience of when i have no longer been required. More often than not after a serious misdemeanour by me but not always, sometimes Her life changes and i no longer have as much of a place in it.
i hadn't heard from Mistress for several weeks although She had kindly tweeted twice that She missed me. Even so the arrival of the text was an immense relief. i was so happy that Mistress still wanted me in Her life.
Unfortunately the scale of the task in cleaning the Tranny Flat and without a key scared me. i know how furious She would be if things were not ready for Her to start abusing slaves.
Fortunately, i was meeting Princess that night in the Tranny Flat with her lovely friend to go out to Tranny Shack. Getting changed was mixed with cleaning and then after a wonderful night of drinking and dancing there was more cleaning and tidying. Eventually i got home at 5am knowing Mistress could arrive any time and praying She would be happy.
Thursday 29 August 2013
Dragged myself out of bed and realised i had forgotten to give Mistress a wake-up cold call at 6am. First fail of the day and i find a message from Her simply saying: "
Hopeless!"
Mistress Scarlett's train is late which has made Her cross but it is a great joy to see Her after almost three weeks. She takes out Her annoyance over the train on me by hitting me a few times, but isn't too displeased with state of the Tranny Flat.
As a special treat Mistress Scarlett, whose generosity is boundless, takes Princess and me for a drink at Ted's Place another tranny hangout. Get fondled by a creepy guy, which tends to be par for the course but i rarely object.
Friday 30 August 2013
Am absolutely shattered from lack of sleep. Do my best to serve Mistress Scarlett Thorne before She leaves back for Wales and i head home to pass out in bed.
Fortunately i find that sometimes if i can't think i work better because i simply react to what Mistress shouts to me.
Before W/we go O/our separate ways Mistress gives me some bonus time off the 3.5 days of punishment i am working off and a chastity release for working so hard. She is very generous but while i am delighted to get rewards it is the fact that they show She is happy with my service that makes me most happy. The week started with me wondering if i would be allowed back and ended with a reward.
Monday September 2 2013
Ordinary day. Get on with some cleaning to make sure the place is ready for MST's return. nothing much else to say. wear my current favourite dress, a short blue and white patterned one from H&M.
Tuesday September 3 2013
While MST is out i pop down to H&M to return a top neither of U/us liked. Unfortunately found out i had missed the return deadline. Really annoyed.
Have to spend far too much time at vanilla work. Boring. But do get to see Mistress in the evening, She even cooks me dinner. Of course i do the washing up.
Wednesday September 4 2013
Frustratingly heavy work load at my vanilla "silly part time job" as MST calls it. Not enough time in Tranny Flat. manage to get some chores done. Although Mistress is unhappy with my first attempt at the bathroom. She can find dirt where anywhere.
Thursday September 5 2013
W/we're all a bit worried about the money situation. Has been a very quiet summer. Summer holidays and school holidays in general are bad for sex workers but this summer has been one of the worst. Money for all of U/us is tight. Slaves need to start serving Mistress properly again She can't live on air She requires their tribute to continue living the lifestyle that allows them to enjoy their nasty little perversions.
i renew my whoring advertising and hope to get some more calls. Was quiet for me but i let my advertising run out over the summer.
Friday September 6 2013
Arrive at Tranny Flat to find one of THOSE lists from Mistress Scarlett Thorne which means a major reorganisation and clean-up is demanded. Top of the list is reorganising the Tranny Wardrobe of Doom (TWOD). It's a fearsome task, the TWOD is basically the engine of the TF. It has so many outfits and things in it that knowing where to begin is difficult.
Mistress goes out for most of the day so i tackle the list but carefully do almost everything else on it that is not the TWOD. That way Mistress is pleased with my progress although horrified to see a pile of clothes on the dungeon floor
Monday September 9
On my way to the TF i buy A LOT of clothes hangers - 60 for tops and dresses and 15 for skirts. Today is the big TWOD reorganisation day.
i spend hours and hours sorting out the TWOD. It has kind of metamorphosised into a monstrous chaos from me (mostly) putting things away where they will fit along with a failure to really look at how it is organised for ages. i move clothes out, i empty boxes, i find new homes for things, i put different things together, i put new labels on, i sort out the shoes and boots and i create a personal drawer for myself (a nice little treat Mistress has allowed me because it helps me get changed when She is having sessions).
At the end of it all i am very pleased and proud of my efforts. The wardrobe has far more space. Things are finally hung properly, it's easier to find things and generally it's better.
Just have to wait for Mistress Scarlett Thorne's judgement now. Certain feeling of trepidation. One concern is that there is STILL a shortage of hangers!
Tuesday September 10
MST returned from Wales last night and when i arrive She announces: "I am NOT happy with the TWOD!"
i almost cry.
Fortunately, She is happy with most of it, just wants two sections switched around. Which i do in a few minutes. i think Mistress loves making me panic and frightened, it also keeps me on my toes. Nothing can ever be "good enough" it must always be better.
Mistress also makes me empty my special drawer and put my things in one of the freed up plastic boxes to be hidden upstairs. Tells me i am in Her way every time i use the drawer.
Don't often write about clients but in the evening my slave J comes to see me. Begs me to let him f*** me. Tell him next time if he is a good boy. He is one of my favourites, really nice and a lovely cock. Even though I am his Mistress I love to suck him off as a treat for being obedient.
Wednesday September 11
Hate Wednesdays! Always bus at vanilla work. Manage to get some maid duties done in the morning.
MST shouts at me for not hanging Her bed sheets etc before. Asks why She bothers to employ me, She often asks that. Sometimes i point out She doesn't pay me anything so technically i am not employed. She always reminds me i am working off an every growing debt to Her worth billions now. Usually She hits me for being cheeky first.
Now i am in the mood for talking about clients. Had a new one today. Lovely gurl. Dressed her in pink and we f***ed and sucked and kissed and fondled. i do a lot of this sort of thing and i have become really good at bringing the fem out of guys who only dreamt they might be fem.
Btw i am only £100 an hour, which is really good for central London, so call me on 07532425141 for whatever fun you want.
Thursday September 12 2013
Today was about one of the bad side of clients in the sex trade. Had a new slave coming to see Me (have to refer to Myself in capitals when I am a Domme, life can be confusing). Anyway he mucked around, would not do what he was told and wouldn't come to the address. In the end I cancelled the session on MST's advice. W/we have to be very careful because there are plenty of nutters, violent types, idiots and thieves out their targeting working girls/ gurls and Dommes.
The guy was furious and really abusive which made me glad I pulled the plug on the session.
But I have one piece of advice when you want to see any Domme: DO EXACTLY WHAT YOU ARE TOLD OR FUCK OFF!
If you follow basic instructions then an hour or more of mind blowing fun is guaranteed if you don't well you'll have to go and wank yourself off on your own.
Friday September 13 2013
Spend the morning maiding but head off early to get STD checks at the clinic. i am very careful when i session for my own sake and clients' too but if you're in the sex business you need to check regularly however careful you are and protect yourself too. Rather worryingly too i know somebody who may have got stabbed with a syringe at a club when i was outwith her so that's an extra reason to have a check up.
Monday September 16 2013
This is going to be a great week. Am on hols but can pretend i am at work so can maid and whore in TF all day without stress of my vanilla life encroaching.
MST is still away in Wales not back til late but there is plenty for me to do. i feel at such peace as i flit around the TF doing chores. It is wonderful having Mistress around but i am very happy on my own as well, being a gurl and knowing i am serving Her.
Have been thinking a lot about buying a latex dress, a red one for just £56 off ebay. Is very much aimed for sessions and me becoming a Tranny Domme. Finally do it today. Feel quite excited about it.
Tuesday September 17 2013
Arrive with more hangers. MST still not back in the morning but it allows me to put some final touches to reorganising the Tranny Wardrobe of Doom. Miss Mistress but She makes her presence felt with some texts to me.
Mistress Scarlett Thorne is the only person i know who can shout by text. As i read them i hear Her voice echoing in my ears. Slightly worried i may be in trouble, well i say "slightly", actually bloody terrified.
Fortunately, when MST arrives She appears to be in a good mood and W/we have a nice chat.
But there is still a money problem which is very worrying. Business is only just picking up again after a very quiet summer and both MST and i have had vanilla life issues which have got in the way of doing sessions.
As i have said before slaves think Mistresses (and whores for that matter!) are rolling in it because W/we charge £100 or £200 an hour. But the truth is that it is a very precarious financial existence and one thing goes wrong then it can cause real problems.
Wednesday September 18 2013
Things are looking bad. MST is talking about U/us quitting the TF so W/we can make more money elsewhere. It means renting another Domme's chambers which is more profitable but means W/we lose all O/our own space.
On a selfish note (and i keep this to myself) i fear it means the end of me serving as a maid. MST insists Her friend who She is considering renting off would be happy to have me, but in my heart i know that sissy maids have to earn the trust of Dommes over a long time and take A LOT of tolerating.
i say nothing because i don't want MST to be pressured to stay in the TF if other options are better for Her. i exist to server Her not the other way round.
Thursday September 19 2013
MST, Princess and i come up with the beginnings of a plan to make the TF work. i beg MST to allow me to pay a little of the rent to help out and She allows me to keep my earnings up to the same amount. i essentially i am giving my whoring earnings in advance and taking a risk on them. i am happy to do that and P agrees to help more with the rent.
Work hard and quietly as MST gets on with things. A lot of cleaning up in between messy sessions.
The atmosphere is a bit more relaxed when i leave.
Friday September 20 2013
Sad day. i am off on road trips for the next two weeks with vanilla work so this is my last proper day of maiding for at least a week.
MST and P are also going on an adventure for the weekend. i work hard to help MST during the day and She promises me tow good gurl butterfly stickers for my work that day and sorting out the TWOD. Feel overjoyed and surprised.
Before that i have to go and have my Hep C jab and get my STD results at the clinic. All clear, relieved but not surprised.
At the end of the day though when She is about to award me the butterflies MST also points out my fails and gives me 13 strokes of the cane (one for every foot sticker on my bucket). Should say MST has Her own way of counting beyond the mundane vanilla norms so 13 was nearer to 30. But She said i took my beating well and i was a good gurl then gave me my butterflies.
i am so lucky to service Mistress Scarlett Thorne.
Thursday September 26 2013
Been away since Sunday on first of two vanilla work road trips. Spend most of the day catching up with piles of cleaning in TF.
After that i go to my vanilla office to pick up my latex dress. Gives me great joy as i take it back to TF.
Have a special treat at the end. able to go out with Mistress, Princess and other friends to watch a debut performance. Am dressed as a man but underneath i am a very happy tranny.
One of those days where i am in awe of Mistress' abilities well beyond Dommeing and bdsm.
Friday September 27 2013
Had hoped for a full day serving MST but things did not work out. Vanilla family crisis meant i had to stay at home and cancel clients. So frustrating and annoying. One of many downsides in living a double life.
Thursday 3 October 2013
Been away on a vanilla work road trip of drinking, long hours and actual work since Sunday. Still feel appallingly hungover. Had hoped to return to real duties in TF today but Mistress Scarlett Thorne is really ill and asked me to stay away. More worried for Her but also sad i can't get back in a dress.
Friday 4 October 2013
MST is still ill. Take day off again. Sleep a lot and get some much needed family time.Having a double life does take a toll on my family time, it is a sacrifice i happily make but it is good to rebalance my life sometimes. Very worried about Mistress though.
Monday 7 October 2013
Nothing to say. Pissed off! Vanilla work nightmare can't get to Tranny Flat to maid. my luck is out!
Tuesday October 8 2013
Back at last! Oh my Goddess! i have not been in the Tranny Flat for more than a week. It is hard to describe the pain and longing i feel when i am not there. It is hard enough to get through the weekend.
Anyway the place is a total tip! mistress will probably beat me up when She reads this but She has had a massive reorganisation, there is piles of washing, washing up and the floors are filthy. There's also lots of things to put away and i don't know where they go any more.
Worked flat out for four hours, didn't even take a coffee break and i hardly feel i have made much of a dent. Hope Mistress appreciates cleaner floors, a cleaner kitchen and all the clean clothes. Suspect she won't, however, hard i work it is impossible to hit Her standards because they simply adjust upwards to make sure i continuously improve.
Didn't get a chance to see Mistress because She was out but hopefully will see Her tomorrow morning. Was also sadly too busy at vanilla work to go out with Her in the evening to an event she had to attend. Hate it when that happens, i so love getting to be in Her entourage.
Late breaking news! Mistress texted me to say She will discuss the state of the TF tomorrow but "feels a tranny shaming coming on." Gulp! is all i can say to that.
Wednesday October 9 2013
Fantastic to see Mistress Scarlett Thorne again! Feel very happy. Get a lot of work done but busy day at vanilla work means i can only serve Her in the morning. Have desperately missed being a gurl and serving Mistress properly.
Spent a lot of time on my knees scrubbing the floor in the Tranny Flat which is really my comfort place in the world, it's where i belong.
Mistress did threaten to sack me for almost ruining one of Her dresses and She was not impressed with my floor cleaning yesterday but somehow i survived. Maybe my long absence made Her more forgiving.
Thursday October 10 2013
Mistress is ill again. So i can't go to the Tranny Flat because She needs some peace and quiet. Very worried about Her because She can't shake off this nasty cold/ flu. Get on with some vanilla work and catch up with this diary but spend the day wishing i could be in a dress maiding.
Friday October 11 2013
MST still ill. i am worried for Her. Sometimes She seems so frail and vulnerable.
Get on with catching up my diary and praying MST will be better on Monday.
Guess illness is also producing money issues again. Slaves really ought to remember this about their Mistress and just help out more and not always expect a session for their tribute. If MST is forced to quit because of a period of illness then they will all lose out and partly because of their selfishness.
Life is full of worries.
Monday October 14 2013
Total utter disaster of the day. Total disaster.
Was very clumsy and quite selfish with my texts to Mistress in the morning and annoyed Her A LOT. Just made matters worse with my response. Actually swore by text. Never done that before and afterwards i was terrified about Her response. If i am lucky She'll kill me but let me back.
Was feeling in despair by the end of the day. Don't know when or if i'll be allowed back. Can't believe i have f***ed up again.
Tuesday October 15 2013
Felt very depressed in the morning. Wondered when and if Mistress would let me back. It could be a month or more again...
Omg! Joyful surprise in afternoon. Mistress texts me in the afternoon and allows me back. Much sooner than i had hoped even at my most optimistic. Obviously, i was very apologetic and genuinely so.
Day ended happily serving Scarlett Thorne in Tranny Flat again. Perhaps not surprisingly it involved another massive reorganisation of the TF. This one is going to take several days at least. It's good to be back
Wednesday October 16 2013
First proper day for while of working in the TF. Big clean in the morning. More reorganisation in the evening. This change around is quite a major project. Hopefully it will help the TF make more money.